Do Harps Float?
Season 5, Episode 31So just to give you an idea of what the city looks like, it is a large crescent-shaped city.
And yes, there are these eight ships kind of sitting out in the bay, kind of doing some just regular patrols.
If we can just stay out of eyesight long enough to work on these speakers and then give the captain unlimited power.
I think you should finish them so he can play and we can at least get a couple ships on our side.
And I will make a capsule that goes underwater that we can get in and sneak by the Armada undetected.
What guarantee can we have from you that you can build a submarine when you can't even build some speakers?
I don't know anything about this Neelix the butler, but we have a Neelix who likes to dress
Well, if you build the speakers, as soon as they get close, we can use the heart to get them to obey us.
You guys, this this grace, the entire time you've been talking, he is completely like walked
No, if you guys listen to us, if you guys listen to the last session, you know, I, I talked to somebody.
So I'm going to say it's going to be two solid roles you'll have to pass, which I don't doubt you're going to be able to do.
But in the meantime, you guys are drifting closer and closer and closer to the ship, to the other ships, because none of you have thought to put down the anchor.
And as you drift closer and closer to shore, Patches, you're on the deck, and you start to hear shouts from the other crews in front of you, hailing to you, trying to get your attention.
I don't think I highly doubt it would have floated by, but maybe you hear this like metal, like
I go up to the front as a demon and go, they're just I just hired this crew to take me home.
This man, this purple demon sees you squinch and he he hails you and he goes, I hail demon brother.
I still presume you have some sort of papers or proof of landing or the ships are starting to come into like some sort of they're getting closer to you.
So you tinker a little bit more on this and you're starting to kind of get the shape of the speakers.
the captain Fitzclibb opens up his, uh, his, uh, his, uh, office door and he sees you and he's like,
oh, lad, you've done it. Hello, captain. Hello. Hello. Oh, that's perfect. That's so loud. How
Fitzclibb has left his room. Uh, he goes down to you squish and he, he, or I'm sorry, he ups
down to you, she chuckles and he gives you a big, big, you know, pat on the shoulder. And he's like,
And I tilt my head towards him, preferably specifically the top of my head, which is full of
hair. Oh, of course, of course. And he, and he ruffles your hair for an adequate amount of time.
Uh, he sees that you are surrounded. The captain sees that you're surrounded by these, these four
Of course. Of course you, I expect you want me to take the harp and strum and bring everybody
sort of robot and like fuzzy slippers and it's like hair is kind of in curlers. And he's got
like, you know, it looks like some sort of like face cream on and he goes, sir, sir. I came here
Neelix, Neelix, this is not a good time. We are surrounded by a armada and, uh, uh, what are
I, uh, I was taking self-care is very important to everybody. And just because you ignore it
If he, if you fail, sir, if you fail, you will be compelled to do all that he wants, all he desires.
If I had known you cared this much when I stole you from him, I, I, I, I'm so happy I stole you.
Yeah. Listen, um, if I call you out again, you gotta be, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's just put on your best dress for the night.
I just came up with this and I can't believe it took me three sessions to come up with this, but like, uh, just, just come out.
The harp is big enough that like, it's not like a tiny little hand thing that you can just strum.
So their attention has now been, uh, been peaked by whatever is going back on about the ship.
And, uh, although you did sway and convince them that your grandfather is dead, this has all just become very shady to them.
Uh, I'm starting to have reservations about, uh, I mean, starting and continuing to have reservations about giving the captain almighty power.
We were very much in love and we were this close to making it to first base if it weren't for all that fucking smoke from Hotman.
But she did tell me very important information, which was the captain is evil, the red captain.
Well, if he can get us past this, we'll need ear, earphone or earbuds to stop us from hearing the, the harp.
And then once he's in a more vulnerable spot, let's say on the top tower of a castle where one could easily be pushed.
Whereas we could just not give him the speakers and like, I don't know, build a paper mache grandpa.
I'm just saying, I've seen a lot of Disney movies where the bad guy gets ultimate power and then bad things happen.
I imagine we're just like, like kind of hunched over, like kind of like trying to keep this real.
Your little five minute chat with him decided to made up his mind that he could be, and is going to be evil.
Chuckles, I, I don't know who, if you're deceiving the cat, if you're deceiving Squish or you're deceiving Patches.
I will say, though, Squish, if you want to roll to see if you believe Chuckles, I 100% will allow that.
Squish, I'm going to have you roll an insight roll to see if, if you can actually detect if Chuckles is like lying to you or not.
You, you are not sold by what, by what Chuckles is saying, but not because you think Chuckles is lying, because you don't know what the fuck he's saying.
You've seen this before from him where he is just something's up in his little brain and, you know, either something's going to explode or something is going crazy.
Well, after knowing that, I pat him on the, I get down on one knee and pat him on the shoulder.
Chuckles, you're the only one who knows how the speaker system works and how to get it set up.
And he's standing there in front of, I stand there in front of the speakers and I've got this cable that I pull out from the back of the speaker and I'm going to go in and I say, captain, are you ready for this?
Uh, he flips the harp onto one side and you can see where there's like a clear port at the bottom.
Are you like, I've been like, I'm like hiding behind a mast kind of like watching very casual,
Uh, I'm going to say that the only people who can hear this, who are in here shot are within
Now, the way that this harps works is that you have to roll, uh, like a high value finesse.
And the effect is going to be, uh, pretty limited at this point because none of you know how to play a harp.
So, Patches, in a moment of glory, somehow you are able to pull the harp and you just break the strap.
Uh, and then Pat just tell me how you throw it over the, how, how you throw that harp overboard.
Like it's a clear, like, like I'm like, like holding it and I run and I just, I'm like, like, just throw it overboard.
Uh, this, you, you, you fumble around with this, this harp and you get to the edge of it and you just, you chuck it overboard.
And in a moment of pure silence, you all watch as this harp just crests the arc of the ship and then just falls into the water below with a plop.
No, but it's not like, it's not like a straight, like, it's not just thinking straight down yet at this point.
Um, the three of you are over the edge looking at this black harp that's starting to slowly disappear under the waters.
But you realize, like, you see the thoughts turning and the wheels turning in his head as he just realized what's happening.
He starts taking a couple of steps towards you and you can, like, his hands are reaching out to you.
I grab Juggles by the shoulder and, like, we're, I feel like we're just both backing up slowly.
I'm just, like, trying to, I'm just, like, holding on because, like, this is really scary, man.
I imagine it's kind of like, like, like an underhand, like a, like a dart ball kind of thing.
Um, and then I am going to say, because, uh, patches, you are going to take, uh, an additional
Um, squish, you have thrown yourself overboard and you are now swimming, uh, to try and catch
And, uh, I would like to unearth, um, underneath one pile of clothes, um, one specifically cannon
Uh, that's going to be, that's because you're trying to aim at the captain and you're trying
Uh, the cannonball, uh, the cannonball just, this is your last cannon, by the way, your cannonball
Uh, he falls into the floors below and kind of disappears, uh, into the dust and the darkness
Might be like the end of Ninja Turtles too, where shredder comes back and starts kicking ass.
Uh, and she, she holds her hand out to you, uh, but she sees the harp and she has like this
And you can feel this through your bond where she's just like, like, like, uh, uh, just very
Uh, you're able to reassure her cause you do have this bond that you built with her and she
Uh, so she does help you back onto the boat, but she's very wary and uncomfortable with the
Uh, at that moment, once you've said that squish, you don't get a chance to respond because the
Uh, with a snap of his finger, suddenly you guys feel the arms, ghostly arms on either side of you.
He, I don't care who or what or why, but there's only one thing we do to mutineers on this ship.
The three of us were doing all that work and this is actually a well-oiled machine that can blow through a fucking armada.
Once in all of your planning, did you say maybe we should just ask the captain to use his ghost trip?
But, yes, you all are slowly drifting towards the shore as you watch this ship, this battle rage on.
But considering there's only one kahuna wave and many of this armada, it seems to be going well for the kahuna.
You're on the Kahuna wave in the galley area, which you've made like a makeshift like homecoming prom, you know, so you got some balloons out.
We're standing all around the bottle and we're about, we're about to ask him out of the bottle and welcome him into, you know, coming out.
What's funny, guys, is that like Neelix, like in my head, he looks like Duckworth, which is Scrooge McDuck's butler.